Tumblr, buddy, listen to me. This is an unprecedented opportunity. You can snap up all of the pie here, and become defacto internet goodguy easy. All you gotta do is… drop the nsfw ban. Unambiguously. Announce that dicks are back on the menu. You want people subscribed the blogs? You want people to actually use your Post+ function? Porn. Let us use it for porn. The youngins aren’t joining this site anyway, you’re not competing with tiktok. The vaguely horny 20-40 demographic though? You can have that. You can have all of that. Think about it.
Do you know how many pinup artists alone are itching to come back to tumblr, but dont because of the unclear, seemingly arbitrary application of your nsfw policy? These are insanely talented people who are practically begging to give you content. For free. But you gotta change the policy. We can’t keep dancing around this. Just think of publicity. The drama. A complete 180. You’d kill it tumblr. You could make it happen. Please.
RIP founding fathers, you would have loved spilling the tea
One of my favorite history facts I haven’t been able to get the time together to verify is that the other founding fathers used to make fun of George Washington because he was blessed with cake. Ya boi had a dump truck ass and was dummy thicc. He had cheeks that would go clapping.
So when roasting him they’d talk about him being calopygian or having a womanly behind.
So yeah, wig wearing drama queens gossiping. That sounds right.
The story of Dumptruck George deserves to be shared
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